FAGGOT WATCHIN TRON
Cosmic Buttress
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« on: April 19, 2010, 02:56:16 PM » |
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So I don't know how many of you followed that link Mary posted in that other thread over there, but I did. And I am so glad I did. That website is full of hilarious interesting things. EXAMPLE! 5 Terrifying Bastardizations of the Wikipedia ModelI would like, quote funny parts of the article, but I'm lazy and don't feel like it. So just go read it. And then read other articles. Because its hilarious and you will enjoy it. |
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Pube Truth
Bee With An Eyepatch
Posts: 651
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« Reply #1 on: April 19, 2010, 07:21:58 PM » |
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8 Romantic songs you didn't know were about rapeI mean, maybe you did know they were about rape, but you didn't come to that realization in as funny a way as they write it: For example, Father Figure by George Michael: Sometime after the release of this song, George Michael was arrested for trying to play a game of softy swords in a public restroom with a cop. So that's off putting. But that aside, any song in which the singer wants to be someone's daddy--someone with tiny hands, for whom their love could be "mistaken" for a crime--you've got yourself a recipe for one creepy-as-shit stew
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Sigs are for fags. I have no assets.
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oatmeal fetish....
Administrator
The Color 7
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« Reply #2 on: April 19, 2010, 09:50:16 PM » |
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Without clicking that link I am guessing that Smooth Criminal is on there! e: what the fuck  |
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« Last Edit: April 19, 2010, 09:52:01 PM by Romeo Roid Rage »
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FAGGOT WATCHIN TRON
Cosmic Buttress
Posts: 2014
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« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2010, 08:09:13 AM » |
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Ethan the point is you DIDN'T know the song is about rape. Nobody mistakes Smooth Criminal for being a sweet romantic song. Everyone knows it is about rape. Dumbass.
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FAGGOT WATCHIN TRON
Cosmic Buttress
Posts: 2014
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« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2010, 09:34:27 AM » |
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From "The 10 Most Awesome Movies Hollywood Ever Killed": Probably no single project in Hollywood history has been attempted as many times, by as many people, as A Confederacy of Dunces. For 26 years, directors, actors, producers, writers and studios have come and gone. So why, in a Hollywood where thousands of quickly-forgotten projects wash in and out like the tide, do they keep coming back to Dunces?
It's because the book, by John Kennedy Toole, is the funniest thing ever written. Don't try to argue. Scientists have proven it (they have a computer or something). The novel is one big, intricate clockwork of a joke, plot threads converging in ways so ridiculous it's almost impossible to grasp it all with one reading. You don't think of them awarding Pulitzer prizes to balls-to-the-wall comedies, but they gave one to Dunces.
Will Ferrell was all set to star in this one as recently as a year ago, with Lily Tomlin and Drew Barrymore and Mos Def (fans of the book will have an easy time guessing who plays which character). But, once again, the studio pulled the plug.
Why it didn't get made: Will Ferrell has said it's the movie everyone in Hollywood wants to make, but no one wants to finance. They're right to have doubts. Anyone who saw the Hitchhiker's movie knows how hard it is to translate a funny novel to the big screen. Too much of the comedy lies in the language, in pages of narration that won't be in the film. Whenever it's time to write the checks for Dunces, somebody always gets cold feet.
This film will always be the weird girl at the book store, the enigmatic one who listens only to bands you've never heard of and who just rolls her eyes when you try to make a joke. Hollywood doesn't need that girl, not with a line of slutty cheerleaders right behind her.
And while we're on the subject: Did we mention the project is cursed? John Belushi was set to star in the film in 1982, but just days before he was to meet with producers, he died. Then John Candy was on board, before his death in 1994. Then Chris Farley, before he died in 1997. Then, all plans to film in New Orleans were halted after the city was devastated by hurricane Katrina. Don't get us wrong, we want to see Dunces on the big screen. But there is a significant chance that, upon release, the sky itself will burn with unholy fire and the rivers will flow red with the blood of the innocent. |
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Pube Truth
Bee With An Eyepatch
Posts: 651
check out my sintax
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« Reply #9 on: April 27, 2010, 05:24:05 PM » |
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From "The 10 Most Awesome Movies Hollywood Ever Killed": Probably no single project in Hollywood history has been attempted as many times, by as many people, as A Confederacy of Dunces. For 26 years, directors, actors, producers, writers and studios have come and gone. So why, in a Hollywood where thousands of quickly-forgotten projects wash in and out like the tide, do they keep coming back to Dunces?
It's because the book, by John Kennedy Toole, is the funniest thing ever written. Don't try to argue. Scientists have proven it (they have a computer or something). The novel is one big, intricate clockwork of a joke, plot threads converging in ways so ridiculous it's almost impossible to grasp it all with one reading. You don't think of them awarding Pulitzer prizes to balls-to-the-wall comedies, but they gave one to Dunces.
Will Ferrell was all set to star in this one as recently as a year ago, with Lily Tomlin and Drew Barrymore and Mos Def (fans of the book will have an easy time guessing who plays which character). But, once again, the studio pulled the plug.
Why it didn't get made: Will Ferrell has said it's the movie everyone in Hollywood wants to make, but no one wants to finance. They're right to have doubts. Anyone who saw the Hitchhiker's movie knows how hard it is to translate a funny novel to the big screen. Too much of the comedy lies in the language, in pages of narration that won't be in the film. Whenever it's time to write the checks for Dunces, somebody always gets cold feet.
This film will always be the weird girl at the book store, the enigmatic one who listens only to bands you've never heard of and who just rolls her eyes when you try to make a joke. Hollywood doesn't need that girl, not with a line of slutty cheerleaders right behind her.
And while we're on the subject: Did we mention the project is cursed? John Belushi was set to star in the film in 1982, but just days before he was to meet with producers, he died. Then John Candy was on board, before his death in 1994. Then Chris Farley, before he died in 1997. Then, all plans to film in New Orleans were halted after the city was devastated by hurricane Katrina. Don't get us wrong, we want to see Dunces on the big screen. But there is a significant chance that, upon release, the sky itself will burn with unholy fire and the rivers will flow red with the blood of the innocent. This makes me so sad. But also sort-of happy because Will Ferrell would do a terrible job as Ignatius. John Candy would have owned. |
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Sigs are for fags. I have no assets.
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FAGGOT WATCHIN TRON
Cosmic Buttress
Posts: 2014
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« Reply #10 on: April 28, 2010, 08:11:59 AM » |
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From "The 10 Most Awesome Movies Hollywood Ever Killed":
This makes me so sad. But also sort-of happy because Will Ferrell would do a terrible job as Ignatius. John Candy would have owned. Agreed. John Candy would be great. But I think ultimately that movie would totally fucking suck no matter who played Ignatius. They make a really good point continuously on cracked, that the hardest part about adapting a book to film is often that what makes books so great is the genius narrative that you just have no way to translate. Of course if they had made the movie with John Candy it would have been like, early 90's? So they probably would have just used a narrator. Which still would suck. Although who else can totally see Helena Bonham Carter as whatsherface? I can't even remember her name...but you know who I mean. The one who would be perfect for Helena Bonham Carter. |
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FAGGOT WATCHIN TRON
Cosmic Buttress
Posts: 2014
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« Reply #11 on: April 28, 2010, 11:19:26 AM » |
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FAGGOT WATCHIN TRON
Cosmic Buttress
Posts: 2014
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« Reply #12 on: April 28, 2010, 04:20:53 PM » |
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Pube Truth
Bee With An Eyepatch
Posts: 651
check out my sintax
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« Reply #13 on: April 28, 2010, 06:23:53 PM » |
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Duh, of course I went for the one about words. I was just browsing a website full of novelty mugs and t-shirts marketed toward linguists (shit with slogans written in the International Phonetic Alphabet that only total linguistic assholes like me would find amusing). So, if you say (to a lady, perhaps), "I possess a deceptively large set of balls," you could mean that your modest bulge belies the real heft of your testicles, which are actually so pendulous that you're forced to strap them to your legs. However, you could also mean that you have tiny love eggs, and that your ball-shaped jean protrusions are actually caused by the hideous malformation of your wang. This is obviously something you want to avoid. |
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Sigs are for fags. I have no assets.
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FAGGOT WATCHIN TRON
Cosmic Buttress
Posts: 2014
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« Reply #15 on: April 30, 2010, 04:15:55 PM » |
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oatmeal fetish....
Administrator
The Color 7
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« Reply #18 on: May 04, 2010, 12:58:01 AM » |
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Also I totally don't need any schooling on how to survive a zombie apocalypse. All I need is one word, but I ain't tell you because its my plan and fuck you get your own.
"gamestop"  |
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oatmeal fetish....
Administrator
The Color 7
Posts: 2447
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« Reply #19 on: May 04, 2010, 01:13:43 AM » |
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