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Author Topic: ROGERT EBERT FUCKING LOVED WATCHMEN. AND IT COMES OUT TODAY OMG  (Read 2316 times)
TheOfficer
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« on: March 05, 2009, 03:26:29 PM »

He gave it four stars, bitcheeees!

super excited, not gonna lie.

/ / / March 4, 2009

Cast & Credits
Dr. Manhattan/Jon Osterman Billy Crudup
Adrian Veidt/Ozymandias Matthew Goode
Sally Jupiter/Silk Spectre Carla Gugino
Laurie Jupiter/Silk Spectre II Malin Akerman
Rorschach Jackie Earle Haley
Edward Blake/Comedian Jeffrey Dean Morgan
Dan Dreiberg/Nite Owl Patrick Wilson
Moloch the Mystic Matt Frewer
John McLaughlin Gary Houston

Warner Bros. and Paramount present a film directed by Zack Snyder. Written by David Hayter and Alex Tse, based on the graphic novel by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons. Running time: 163 minutes. Rated R (for strong graphic violence, sexuality, nudity and language).

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by Roger Ebert

After the revelation of “The Dark Knight,” here is “Watchmen,” another bold exercise in the liberation of the superhero movie. It’s a compelling visceral film — sound, images and characters combined into a decidedly odd visual experience that evokes the feel of a graphic novel. It seems charged from within by its power as a fable; we sense it’s not interested in a plot so much as with the dilemma of functioning in a world losing hope.

That world is America in 1985, with Richard Nixon in the White House and many other strange details, although this America occupies a parallel universe in which superheroes and masked warriors operate. The film confronts a paradox that was always there in comic books: The heroes are only human. They can be in only one place at a time (with a possible exception to be noted later). Although a superhero is able to handle one dangerous situation, the world has countless dangerous situations, and the super resources are stretched too thin. Faced with law enforcement anarchy, Nixon has outlawed superhero activity, quite possibly a reasonable action. Now the murder of the enigmatic vigilante the Comedian (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) has brought the Watchmen together again. Who might be the next to die?

Dr. Manhattan (Billy Crudup), the only one with superpowers in the literal sense, lives outside ordinary time and space, the forces of the universe seeming to coil beneath his skin. Ozymandias (Matthew Goode) is the world’s smartest man. The Nite Owl (Patrick Wilson) is a man isolated from life by his mastery of technology. Rorshach (Jackie Earl Haley) is a man who finds meaning in patterns that may only exist in his mind. And Silk Spectre II (Malin Akerman) lives with one of the most familiar human challenges, living up to her parents, in this case the original Silk Spectre (Carla Gugino). Dr. Manhattan is both her lover and a distant father figure living in a world of his own.

These characters are garbed in traditional comic book wardrobes — capes, boots, gloves, belts, masks, props, anything to make them one of a kind. Rorshach’s cloth mask, with its endlessly shifting inkblots, is one of the most intriguing superhero masks ever, always in constant motion, like a mood ring of the id. Dr. Manhattan is contained in a towering, muscular, naked blue body; he was affected by one of those obligatory secret experiments gone wild. Never mind the details; what matters is that he possibly exists at a quantum level, at which particles seem exempt from the usual limitations of space and time. If it seems unlikely that quantum materials could assemble into a tangible physical body, not to worry. Everything is made of quantum particles, after all. There’s a lot we don’t know about them, including how they constitute Dr. Manhattan, so the movie is vague about his precise reality. I was going to say Silk Spectre II has no complaints, but actually she does.

The mystery of the Comedian’s death seems associated with a plot to destroy the world. The first step in the plot may be to annihilate the Watchmen, who are All That Stand Between, etc. It is hard to see how anyone would benefit from the utter destruction of the planet, but remember that in 1985 there was a nuclear standoff between the United States and the Soviet Union that threatened exactly that. Remember “Better Dead Than Red”? There were indeed cold warriors who preferred to be dead rather than red, reminding me of David Merrick’s statement, “It’s not enough for me to win. My enemies must lose.”

In a cosmic sense it doesn’t really matter who pushed the Comedian through the window. In a cosmic sense, nothing really matters, but best not meditate on that too much. The Watchmen and their special gifts are all the better able to see how powerless they really are, and although all but Dr. Manhattan are human and back the home team, their powers are not limitless. Dr. Manhattan, existing outside time and space, is understandably remote from the fate of our tiny planet, although perhaps he still harbors some old emotions.

Those kinds of quandaries engage all the Watchmen, and are presented in a film experience of often fearsome beauty. It might seem improbable to take seriously a naked blue man, complete with discreet genitalia, but Billy Crudup brings a solemn detachment to Dr. Manhattan that is curiously affecting. Does he remember how it felt to be human? No, but hum a few bars. ... Crudup does the voice and the body language, which is transformed by software into a figure of considerable presence.

“Watchmen” focuses on the contradiction shared by most superheroes: They cannot live ordinary lives but are fated to help mankind. That they do this with trademarked names and appliances goes back to their origins in Greece, where Zeus had his thunderbolts, Hades his three-headed dog, and Hermes his winged feet. Could Zeus run fast? Did Hermes have a dog? No.

That level of symbolism is coiling away beneath all superheroes. What appeals with Batman is his humanity; despite his skills, he is not supernormal. “Watchmen” brings surprising conviction to these characters as flawed and minor gods, with Dr. Manhattan possessing access to godhead on a plane that detaches him from our daily concerns — indeed, from days themselves. In the film’s most spectacular scene, he is exiled to Mars, and in utter isolation reimagines himself as a human, and conjures (or discovers? I’m not sure) an incredible city seemingly made of crystal and mathematical concepts. This is his equivalent to 40 days in the desert, and he returns as a savior.

The film is rich enough to be seen more than once. I plan to see it again, this time on IMAX, and will have more to say about it. I’m not sure I understood all the nuances and implications, but I am sure I had a powerful experience. It’s not as entertaining as “The Dark Knight,” but like the “Matrix” films, LOTR and “The Dark Knight,” it’s going to inspire fevered analysis. I don’t want to see it twice for that reason, however, but mostly just to have the experience again.

SOURCE:
http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20090304/REVIEWS/903049997
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Shire Le Buff
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« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2009, 04:18:54 PM »

I am really excited to hate this movie  Cool Spot
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TheOfficer
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« Reply #2 on: March 05, 2009, 04:26:44 PM »

I'm still trying to pretend it could possibly maybe be good?

....I am hoping it is atleast pretty, OKAY?
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« Reply #3 on: March 05, 2009, 04:53:33 PM »

The Phildelphia Inquirer gave it 3 stars (out of 4 POSSIBLE stars).
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« Reply #4 on: March 06, 2009, 12:15:19 PM »

Not that the man hasn't had a long and successful career, but I seem to remember Roger Ebert loving pretty much everything. Nothing wrong with that, of course. But in the same way I don't trust a critic that does across-the-board panning, I tend not to pay attention when Roger Ebert says something is the best "X" ever. It's sort of like a reverse "Boy Who Cried Wolf" problem.
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« Reply #5 on: March 06, 2009, 04:50:13 PM »

one of the most intriguing superhero masks ever, always in constant motion, like a mood ring of the id.

In a cosmic sense it doesn’t really matter who pushed the Comedian through the window. In a cosmic sense, nothing really matters, but best not meditate on that too much.

discreet genitalia
« Last Edit: April 02, 2011, 10:18:32 AM by oatmeal fetish.... » Logged

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« Reply #6 on: March 07, 2009, 12:15:47 PM »

God damn that shit sucked.
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« Reply #7 on: March 07, 2009, 05:31:29 PM »

God damn that shit sucked.

So...Skip it?
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« Reply #8 on: March 07, 2009, 06:33:59 PM »

ever since I heard about the lack of a certain large thing in the end I got a whole lot less excited ... haven't seen it quite yet
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« Reply #9 on: March 07, 2009, 06:57:26 PM »

It was like someone who had skimmed the comic tried to explain what happens in it but forgot that there was a story and characters and was only able to focus coherently on what the pictures looked like and how cool the fights were. The story is still in there, kind of, but it's told in such a disjointed, awkward and drawn-out way that I ended up having a hard time following it. And I know the story pretty well.

Also the acting is fuck-awful, and the soundtrack was laughably bad. I mean literally, people were laughing. It might have even been sort of okay if the soundtrack wasn't so distractingly inappropriate to the point where every scene with music became a parody of itself.

But see it if you want to. I never like anything. Smiley
« Last Edit: March 07, 2009, 07:02:27 PM by Begotten gaylord » Logged

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« Reply #10 on: March 07, 2009, 07:03:20 PM »

But see it if you want to. I never like anything. Smiley

Good point - has there been a single movie you've seen since say ... episode three that you've enjoyed?

The B paper said that the director clearly knew how to describe bullets tearing through flesh, and little else, gave it two stars of five. Rotten tomatoes, however, gave it a 65, and said it was a 'faithful adaptation of the novel'
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« Reply #11 on: March 07, 2009, 07:24:48 PM »

Good point - has there been a single movie you've seen since say ... episode three that you've enjoyed?

UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
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« Reply #12 on: March 07, 2009, 08:01:51 PM »

From the man who brought you that one movie with zero acting and 90 percent fight scenes and naked women: WATCHMEN!
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« Reply #13 on: March 07, 2009, 09:29:13 PM »

I'm waiting for the day in our future when studio execs realize not every comic book movie has to be Sin City.
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« Reply #14 on: March 08, 2009, 02:03:12 AM »

Webisode three was the pinacle of movie greatness. Nothing else even comes close. Children of Men? Feh. Only a Sith deals in absolutes ...
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« Reply #15 on: March 09, 2009, 01:21:11 AM »

I guess that would've been somebody's job.

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TheOfficer
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« Reply #16 on: March 09, 2009, 10:32:12 AM »

Saw it last night.
Meh.

It wasn't bad, it wasn't good. It was pretty. I actually think the disjointed telling of the story in the movie was pretty accurate to the comic, so that didn't bother me so much. I had the same coherency issues on my first readthru the comic.
Maybe its that I was never a giant fan of the comic, I didn't find it as unbelievably amazing as everyone else. I thought some of the acting was decent(and some of it hurt me) and that the visuals were pretty spot on. But overall it just didn't do anything for me.

The soundtrack, however, was laughably bad and more than once it made me feel incredibly awkward. Much like the very very very awkward sex scene. My artistic sentiments were literally offended by the terrible bubastis cgi.

I was not bothered by the blue dick, I'm a lot happier they had it in there rather than try to ~*CLEVERLY*~ hide it in every scene.

Overall C

EDIT:
I too prefer the new ending, not going to lie. I was always sort of "wtf" about the absurdity of the one in the comic, I think the change makes more sense.
« Last Edit: March 09, 2009, 11:39:10 AM by TheOfficer » Logged

Famous Hogbert
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« Reply #17 on: March 09, 2009, 11:29:12 AM »

(SPOILERS TO THOSE WHO HAVE NOT SEEN)



Pros:
- I think Rorschach is the only character they really got right. He comes across as brutal and single-minded as he is in the comic. The Comedian and Dr. Manhattan were pretty close, but I'm not such a fan of Billy Crudup.
-No Black Freighter. Thank god. It was a neat thing in the comic book until I got caught up enough in the main story to barely care. The film could not pay attention to all the little side stories in the comic, and its better that way.
-No alien attack. I kind of like how Veidt turned the world against Dr. Manhattan (not in the comic OH NO!) It seemed more fitting since Manhattan was so detached anyway. I also like the idea that for all Manhattan's god-like powers he was outsmarted in the end.
-They included more character back story than I thought they were going to, so that was a pleasant surprise. 

Cons:
-Horrible, laughable soundtrack. The mix of the film was weird too, at some of the most key moments of dialogue, I could barely hear what was said.
-Bubastis was a blue CG cat, why the fuck did they do that.
-I really, really could not stand watching Nixon. For all the parody that the film and the comic contain, he was maybe the worst parody of all.
-I wish they'd had the talk between Manhattan and Veidt at the end. The newsroom bit was stupid.
-Upping the sex & violence added nothing.

Whatever storytelling flaws the movie had, I can't blame them all solely on Snyder. He's certainly not perfect, and neither is the comic.
« Last Edit: March 09, 2009, 05:49:21 PM by EamonnFork » Logged

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« Reply #18 on: March 09, 2009, 12:23:04 PM »

I like Rorschach in the movie because he talks like Batman and not many people are doing that these days.

I like how they made Manhattan the dupe at the end too because Science, nuclear power, and nudity are so gorram' bad for the world.
« Last Edit: March 09, 2009, 12:26:56 PM by pasta.. MANIAC!!! » Logged

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« Reply #19 on: March 09, 2009, 12:45:58 PM »

I too prefer the new ending, not going to lie. I was always sort of "wtf" about the absurdity of the one in the comic, I think the change makes more sense.

I don't mean to make anyone defensive, I'm generally curious, in what way is the one in the comic absurd? Someone told me that the comic's ending is a cop-out and I have to disagree. The bad-guy wins, the heroes don't pull off a crazy, last-minute rescue of the truth and become complicit in Veidt's scheme. Is it the fake martian thing?
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