A quick look at Emperor Ethan’s inbox
Written by Emperor Ethan
From: Dan Delaney
Subject: (none)
You need to update. I don’t care what the hell it is, just as long as it’s up by next weekend. You can talk about how much you hate me. You can image search for “ Osama porn� and post the results. You can slap the keyboard with your dick for 5 minutes. I don’t fucking care. Just put something up you fucker! Also your parents said I could move in with them as long as I pretended to be you, so don’t expect any more money or contact from them.
From: “Theodore Corona”
Subject: Impress your lady immediately and 4ever ySI@
Rated NO.1 Penis Enlargement Pill on the Market!
Gain Up To 300+ Full Inches In Length (manliness)
Increase Your Penis Width (Girth) By 20000 thousand%
Ejaculate semen capable of seeping through titanium and teaming with tiny little piranhas which will devour the flesh of your enemies and loved ones!!
Produce Stronger and Rock Hard Erections fierce enough to tear your Woman apart as you thrust violently into her half destroyed husk of a pelvis!!!!!!
You are scum!!! iuSY
From: Steve Figgatt
Subject: .;’-
fuck dude sits;’ theres this ch8cin and I htnik she thrrwe up on my pilwol can OH FCUK thers thins guyj with 900h ieve had like 89 beers yo you nee to co me u herex and wed’ didrnk snd a we xan il sexdave.
From: Hollie Webber
Subject: POPUlar software at LOW PRICES xcvTH
It’s good to talk to you again EMPERORETHAN@YAHOO.COM
Did you know Penis Enlargement Pills now come at 80% less prices!
If you don’t buy our pills your girlfriend will murder you!!! You’ll be dead and no one will attend your tiny penis funeral!
Increase you’re Manhood! With your new PLUS 2000 points Quasi-Penis, women will flock to you! You will be able to have sex with several vaginas at once! Any woman within a 500 mile radius of you will die from orgasm!!!!! If you don’t buy our pills GOD WILL KILL YOU!
